Rethinking Recompense

It is a common enough malady that when two persons have a disagreement of some magnitude, they will stop talking for a great length of time. The parties take advantage of this time to do one of two things: Wait until the other person comes crawling back so that they themselves can determine the terms of the relationship or wait until the other person comes crawling back so that they can pulverize the self esteem and repute of the other person further. When one of them gets too impatient, they go to the second person to try to get the next best options. They either go to swallow their pride or they go to deliver their ultimatum. When both people are stubborn enough to let it go on for some time, it can become unnecessary for a second meeting. The individuals involved move on, forget the offense, or have given up on the second person. It can be trouble though, when a person who has moved on is given an ultimatum. The "blast from the past" can open deep, old wounds. You start to think back over the time that has passed between the ugly past and the now ugly present. Bitterness sets in, and the words that were meant to finalize the matter only manage to make you feel worse. Guilt, jealousy, or anger could be the only fruits of having the last word. I will admit that there are some people really need recompense, people who figuratively spend their whole lives waiting by the phone for that last word. It would seem that the only way to avoid lasting pain and suffering is to not let issues fester, to get all issues out in the open and taken care of immediately. There may still be some pain, it may even seem extreme and unnecessary, but like taking off a band-aid, its better for a short sting than a drawn out pain.

Time: Does it Fly or Crawl by?

Remarking on the passage of time is something that man has been doing since before he was man. Since troglodytes lumbered across ancient plains, history was being made and kept. Though crude and vague their cave drawings give descriptions of their lifestyles and environment. The natives of ancient Choco Canyon spent their whole lives studying and documenting how the heavens changed over time, erecting massive monuments to mirror the cycles of the sun and moon. Through the ages mankind has been compelled to mark and represent every second that ticks by. And it is not a whim, but a divine calling. Without considering the past, one cannot fathom the future. There would be no foresight, no provision. Such an existence would not even be primal, but feral. Gorging and than starving, rather than rationing and surviving. To prevent this self destructive end, we take what we can from the past and use it to make a better future.

The Reality of Resolutions

A tradition of New Years is to make "New Years Resolutions." Weight loss, exercise, and other wise self improvement is the general theme for such things. Its nearing the end of February and the sad reality of the matter is that even now, many people have yet to begin following their personal "Yellow Brick Roads." For example: a mother of four who is no closer to fitting into her high school jeans than she way the day she made her goal to do so. Or a paunchy middle aged man who has aspirations of a triathlon, but has done no more exercise than walking from hole to hole at the golf course. There is a very apt American saying: "The best day to start a diet is tomorrow." What keeps us chained to our unsatisfactory lives? The unwillingness to change, the fear of failure, and the lack of resolve. Resolve is the key part of resolution, so you must first have the courage to climb your personal mountain, before you can expand your horizons.

Death by Monotony.

As of late, I am afraid I have been suffering at the hands of a most heinous foe: Monotony. It is quite a cliche to say that one is "dying of boredom", but until recently I have not had adequate respect for the idea. Being jobless, penniless, and stuck in the suburbs I feel that my life wouldn't even qualify for the seediest of sitcoms. On account that I don't get into nearly enough mischief. Without inspiration for literary endeavors nor capitol for adventures, I often find myself pacing about my chateau. Of course there are more productive activities I could put into practice, but because of my as yet youthful spirit I scorn such things unless indisputably ordered to do said tasks. It occurs to me that those who may be reading this article may indeed be suffering in a comparable manner so to these, I empathize with utmost sincerity. I would like to add as a parting request, that all those who do read this please post an activity that they partake in when at the end of their creative rope, as it were.

The Seed of Ambition

Through the course of history, ambition has taken many forms. Greed, Manifest Destiny, even the "American Dream" to some extent. Often times, though, ambition can be the heart of disharmony. In your climb to reach the top, you may drag others down. Was this not the case in all of the crusades and the exploration of the "New World?" Or in corporations when workers resort to back-stabbing and brown-nosing? Is it right that others should have to fall for us to rise? President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, once said that for us as a people to triumph, we must stand together and lift where we stand. That through unity, we may best further ourselves and our cause. This day, for the first time in the history of our great nation, an African American has been elected to the office of President of the United States of America. I imagine that at the start of his campaign, President Obama felt that perhaps he was being too ambitious, that our day was not the day, nor our time the time for such a revolutionary idea. But the people have spoken that this is the day and time for a man of this caliber. And with this decision they have high hopes for their future. I make no claim that I know what may happen over the next four to eight years, but I do hold firm in the belief that a strong will to overcome and rise is always in the public interest. Even if it only serves to inspire others to take a stand themselves.

Making Time To Be Patient

Its a fact of life that even the most thought-out plans may have unforeseen complications. You strive to prepare as well as possible, but despite your sincerest efforts you are foiled. Often times, the "wrench in the works" is something that, though trivial it may be, remains an insurmountable barrier. For instance, the chief resource of transportation for the evening is rendered unusable due to the fact that it was already being utilized by a co-inhabitant of one's abode. The lack of communication regarding the aforementioned fact results in raised tempers and frigid fingers and toes. The whole affair could have been avoided by planning further ahead and cooperation between the individuals involved. I point I wish to make is thus: Plan ahead, people aren't perfect. Do as much as you can yourself, allowing for your own error and those of others. When things do happen to go wrong, losing your composure is the least helpful thing to do. When you get emotional, everyone else does too. Take a deep breath and decide what to do next. When you have resolved the issue, hold no malice for those who contributed to it. You are as imperfect as they. The whole experience will help everyone make the wiser decision in the future.

Meeting Our Holiday Ghosts

I'm sure everyone who reads this is familiar with Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol." Throughout the night of Christmas Eve he is "haunted" by phantoms of holiday seasons past, present, and future. What was, is, and may be "haunts" us all to an extent, I suppose. But as I was thinking about that story, I paused to think what those spirits might have shown me. Waking up at 5:00 in the morning and waiting impatiently for my parents to wake up at 6:00 so we could go open our gifts. Sneaking peeks at the Christmas tree and how many gifts Santa had brought. A flurry as gifts almost explode out of their wrapping, the blazing fire consuming the remains. I tried to remember a specific year, but I realized that I couldn't really. I don't have specific memories of Christmases past, just thoughts and feelings. As for the present Christmas, I'm trying to keep my expectations lower than usual. Our family has had a trying year and is not financially on its feet yet. I'm sure we have had similar years in the past too, and that's what makes those past Christmases so beautiful in my mind. That despite our situation, we have never not had presents on Christmas. We have always had something waiting for us under the tree and in our stockings. As to Christmases yet to come? I confess no small amount of anxiety over what it will be like. For two years I will be sleeping in a bed that is not my own, the familiarity of my "home town" far behind me. After that, I can hardly imagine what life will be like. Marriage, children, and Christmases of our own. It must be an interesting thing for parents to watch their children grow up like that. So today, think back to a Christmas that you loved. Whether it was as a teenager, the first as a couple, the first with a child, or just memorable. Think of what your own Holiday Ghosts might show you of your past, present, and future.